I had just turned 20 years old and I had no stable place to live. My parents had a divorce when I was 17 years old and I dropped out of school my senior year. After that, I got my GED. I was always tossed around from home to home so it made it difficult to keep a job or get an education. I felt so unloved and I was willing to do anything to get someone to love me. I did what a lot of young women do, looking for love in the wrong places. I felt that I had to sleep with a man to earn his love. (Wrong)
I had decided on going into the army at the time, so I was attending PT until I could sign my contract. I was also seeing a guy I had known and previously dated. I took a pregnancy test at Fort Gillem during my physical and it was negative but I was pregnant. I started to worry when my monthly was 14 days late. I knew that I was signing my contract the following day so I took two more tests. Two lines. Positive. I'll be honest, I stood over the bathroom counter and cried my eyes out. I had no job and no stable home. My first reaction was to tell the father. He didn't want responsibility right off the bat. He questioned if it was his baby, then went out and got drunk. I had zero support. I only had myself to rely on.
So, I went out and got a job. I'm not talking an easy one either. My job was in a chicken plant hanging frozen chickens on a belt in the cold all night. I loved my baby enough to do it. She was a part of me. I then found an apartment to rent and got it. Months had passed and it became clear that the father was absent and had no intention of helping.
I was now about 6 months pregnant and I started seeing a nice guy I met from work. Now, mind you most guys are not like him. I had my daughter and a year later we were married. When we got the money, my husband adopted my beautiful daughter. She is now 2 years old and she has a little brother who is 7 months old today.
Here's my point. No matter what the situation, having a baby is scary at first. However, you can do it! My life was headed the wrong direction before my baby came along. I believe she was sent to change my life. I wouldn't trade her love for anything. She is and always will be my miracle!